I am sooooooo doing NOTHING!!!!

And loving it!!

No engagements.

Neither Dan nor I would have been surprised if either Danielle or Jessica would have had an announcement... would have bet on Danielle before Jess.

Ahhhhhh suspense!!!

M

Christmas picts.

All asleep in their beds.

The Meyer extravaganza is over and I managed to glide on through with only positive energy... so that is good :)

Evereyone is asleep right now at 6;21 am and Spiderman is in suspension on my TV. I'm not sure if it is there because Connor was watching or the other "kids". The Wii has gotten a workout over the last two days... mostly Matt & Jessica playing Mario Brothers. It is fun to watch them interact with each other.

After we got home from the party last night , Jamie, Ryan, Jessica & Matt, Danielle & Zack , Dan & I (and Buster) all sat around our kitchen table last night reminiscing. I should say the girls did. This is one of the first times I have heard some of their stories about growing up... I can't quite describe the scene but let's just say that they had me in tears laughing at least twice & when I glanced at Dan he was laughing pretty hard too.

That Danielle is a stitch. She was a bugger to raise & I know it ain't over 'til it's over, but she IS funny & she can remember the darndest things. It was interesting to hear the boyfriends & Ryan pipe up too. Each of them have been together long enough to recognize personality traits that still exist in the adult form.

Dan & I went to bed & we could still hear all six of them talking for awhile afterward. We cuddled , Dan fell asleep , & even though I was sleepy and couldn't make out the conversation, I couldn't help buy revel and bask in the moment of peace and success.

Well, Buster is stirring but no mouses yet. Connor & Grace will open their presents this am. Danielle & Zack leave today & fly back to Denver on Monday. Jamie & Ryan have some time off yet... they may stay another night but I doubt it, they are on a 4 day marathon of Christmas...were with the Haraden's (Ryan's fam) in Virginia (MN) for two days prior. Jess is home until mid- January. Still haven't heard from any schools except St. Scholastica... she wasn't accepted there. La Cross she didn't make the first cut, but there is still a possibility there, hasn't heard from the U of M main campus & I can't remeber the 4th but obviously she hasn't been accepted there yet either. She's in limbo, but isn't overly anxious (which she can be) so she must know what is what.

Gotta go, my last post was a downer I thought, but it is behind me & looking forward is a good thing since looking back is long ago & forward , well, at 53 a person doesn't want to waste much time.

Thanks for listening, I'll post a few picts later

Flash!

Learn from my faults. Not all has been roses.

Christmas confessions. My Christmas wish for you is to put yourself & your children before all else without exception. I regretfully often times did not. And Dan did not put me before his job pretty near all of the 30 years of R & M's existence. OK. After 27 years he started to see the light. Slow fucker. Don't allow that to happen to you either. No roses:

I missed many, many parent-teacher conferences because my kid's conferences were on the same night as mine.

I have come home from school & had Jamie ask me to read her a book & I've actually said to her, "You've got to be kidding me". Yeah. Early on I set a pattern of putting other people's kids before mine... don't do it when you can help it.

One time I missed an important hockey game of Jessica's because I was attending a science conference that I felt obligated to attend.

I spent many many years going to Meyer events and hating it because I did not feel like I fit in, I felt like I had to go because of the kids & I resented it nearly
100% of the time.

Now I often times stay home, thoroughly revel in that quiet time by myself and frequently think about how glad I am that my kids still look forward to, change plans for & still go to many of the Meyer get togethers. I did something right. They are all Meyers after all.

I personally could go for the next 20 years and not see one of Dan's seven sisters and wouldn't miss one clever comment. I never heard one in 33 years.

I remember sitting on the floor late at night while the kids were asleep wrapping presents for so many hours that my back ached... all the while Dan would be sitting in his chair claiming he "can't wrap presents". I resented it.... deeply.

One time, when Jamie was 6 years old & in the hospital for dehydration I did not take a day off ( neither did Dan) to be with her because I did not trust a sub to do my job right. Jamie wet her pants in bed because the nurses did not answer her call in time. She didn't tell me about it for a few weeks and when I found out I was devistated. I have never gotten over feeling guilty for not taking that day off.

I took responsibility for driving the kids to & from day care for most of the years that they were in day care. It was an unspoken assumption that Dan's business & its success took precedence over my career and I am responsible for letting that happen.

There have been times when the kids came home alone when it was -20˚ .

I went through a stage ( lasted for 10 years) of refusing to clean the house because I had a classroom to keep clean. Fuck the house. For ten years my house was a pig sty by Friday.

I am amazed that our marriage has stayed in tact. There are lingering & unspoken painful feelings & tender topics that are just now coming up in Dan's & my early morning conversations. The conversations are very healing in nature & I think both of us want to trudge through them as quickly as possible so that we can move forward in our relationship.

I am in a place where I am ready to let them all go, I just wish that some things had been different. It is a revelation to me and down right comforting to learn that Dan wishes that some things had been different as well.

Why my post? If you think twice and avoid just one thing that will thwart off lingering resentment in any sort of way in your lives as young Moms & wives, I will be glad I wrote this. And if you are all smarter than me to begin with, well it is cathartic to write it anyway.

Mary.... Flash is just listening tonight.

Originally written five nights ago. Had to think if I really wanted to share this. Guess I do. Have a good one. LATER>>>> I now intend to begin to watch Man vs Wild marathon.

I can do these.

I have a cousin who lives in Seattle & she blogs here.

Jenny is one of four of my first cousins (total) and the only female. Jenny has a 9 month old little girl named Lucy,is a writing teacher & a stay-at-home Mom. We have just reconnected on Facebook.


I'd like to share Rainy Day Girl, Jenny Puckett- Miller & her blog with all of you.

Flash!

I just caught the Christmas Spirit!!!

Well, well, well. It looks like the ENTIRE family will all be home on the 26th.

I just turned from Crabby Patty to OMGosh!!!!! I will have my girls all together for the first time since LAST Christmas!!!!!! I can't even describe to you how that makes me feel!! What I look forward to the MOST???? The drone of conversation & laughter... there is just no way to describe how that makes me feel.

I can't wait to see my girls!!!

Flash!!!!!!

ha ha. Jessica found this one..

What a riot!

Where has the year gone?

It seems like yesterday that it was August. And now. Thanksgiving has come and gone, our Christmas letter is nearly done,& snow flakes are dropping gracefully from the sky.

At my age you ask, is that good or bad? Right now it feels good & that is good enough!

Flash.

E mail to my Mom.

Last time I talked to her she said, " e mail me once in awhile" so I just did.

Hi Mom.

Can't sleep. I've had short(er) nights of sleep lately. Conferences two nights, Thnaksgiving with company & tonight was the second day of after school science club with 28 boys and 3 girls. WOW!!!! I know why God didn't give me boys!!

Nah. They are really great kids just a lot of energy!!!! But i do not understand the whole "I'll spend 2.5 hours building a really cool robotic car and then see how many times I can crash it , throw my shoe at it, body slam it /or send it down the stairs until juuuuuuuuuuuuuuust before it self destructs "! Come to think of it maybe the reason I LIKE doing science club is because it reminds me of my whole life!!! Hmmmm.

Gotta tell you about Connor & his "guys". He has a little Superman zipper suitcase that he carries small (4-5") action figures of superman, batman, spiderman, ironman and black canary in . When he's in the mood, & he decides he is going to play "guys", He'll zip & unzip the suitcase a few times, stare into the suitcase ( lying on his tummy on the floor) admire each one and then decide who is going to be the "bad guy" and then the others work together to save the day. He has all sorts of communication (the kid's vocabulary & imagination is something) going on.

Normally he asks Ryan to play " guys " and sometimes Ryan takes intense part in the action and plotting & sometimes he just holds up one of the action figures (while reading a book) and Connor just makes everything up himself & interacts with it.

Well, one time Connor asked me to play "guys" while I was sitting on the couch. I chose batman (he has a cool black cape) & flew befhind Ryan who was sitting on the floor in front of me and I quite seriously said to Connor and his guy , "Why hello Spiderman! I was just in the neighborhood and thought I'd drop by to see you!" at which point Ryan looks up from his book, looks at Connor and says "Grandma doesn't know how to play "guys" very well does she"? Connor paused, got back in the moment of reality, looked at his Dad and laughed hysterically. We all had a good laugh out of that one. Based on my science club experiences & my "guy" playing skills, I gather I have lost some of my tomboy IQ. Sad.... but it was such a good run!!! :)

Workshop day tomorrow. A break from kids... but going well.

I love you,

Mary

Girls & Boys

These came in the mail today. Yeah Amazon.com!!!! These picts. sooooo represent Connor & Grace. Hee hee hee:)

Poor Jessica.

One more year (actually less) with this guy Dr. Keener. His quote she posted last night:


"You go to school to learn more and more about less and less until you know everything about nothing"

Nice.